Saturday, June 16, 2012

Notes to My Younger Self

When I first saw this photo on Facebook this morning, posted by my sweet boyfriend/husband to celebrate our 26th wedding anniversary, I looked at that 21 and 24 year old and wanted to hug their precious, ignorant selves. And then I wanted to sit them down and give them a strong talking to and hand them a list of truths that would make their next 26 years easier.

Married or not, have you made your own list of what you'd like to say to your younger self? I'd love to hear what's on yours.
I'll share a few things on mine- some meant just for me and some for both of us:

1.  If you consistently throw up every morning before work and have at least one cry every night (and you're sure you're not pregnant) you're probably in the wrong job. It's okay. Get out of there.

2. Don't rent that apartment in Greenbelt, Maryland. Those people exchanging things in the parking lot are not trading baseball cards.

3. You can't be God's teacher's pet by trying to be good all the time. We're ALL God's teacher's pets. God loves all of us the same, whether we like it or not. :)

4. Get off that foil tanning blanket and throw away the baby oil! You'll thank me later. (Though the dermatologist won't.)

5 .If you want to work, work! If you're doing something that makes you happy, your children will benefit. And you'll be able to afford vacations which will make you more cheery and less grouchy.

6. Don't let well-meaning people talk you out of a job you want. You'll eventually come back to it anyway.

7. Be nice to yourself and buy good shoes.

8. If you're going to choose parts of the Bible to take literally, be ready to take it all literally- the shellfish ban, the multiple wives, the stoning a wayward child, slavery, the ban against mixed fibers. Consider taking a hard, serious look at Jesus instead, so you don't end up tangled up in law and estranged from love.

9.  Remember that with your sweetie- and with coworkers and anybody- it's better to be kind than right.

10. Don't walk on an icy Denver street with a blueberry jello salad. Even if you do feel very coordinated at the moment.

11. Becky, if you work all the time and don't write and paint and sew and draw, you will start to wilt and wither and get easily irritated and mean.

12. Realize now that one of you is an extrovert and likes to talk, and the other is an introvert and likes to think inside her head. Allow each other space to be what you are. Neither way is better so don't try to be the other. It won't work and it will give you a headache.

13. Don't haul off your husband's favorite easy chair to Goodwill when he's on a business trip.

14. Don't try to pretend you're not squeamish. It's better to tell the doctor ahead of time so you don't end up on the floor with a wet towel on the back of your neck and a room full of nurses trying to give you Coke.

15. You will have difficult times and you will have delightful times. Hang in there and know that it really does get better and better.

Okay, so that's the short list.
What would you say to your younger self?


Jennifer R. Hubbard said...

It really will get better.

The first time you break up with [name redacted], stay broken up and move on. Don't get back together and drag it out.

Yes, you will publish a book. You might want to try your hand at a young-adult novel even sooner.

There is a time to live in the city, and a time to move away.

Did I mention, things get better?

Unknown said...

This is beautiful Becky! I especially love #'s 8, 9 & 12.

To my younger self I would say:

"listen to your gut. if something feels wrong, there IS a reason, usually a very good reason."

"You can never expect reciprocal love from someone who doesn't feel comfortable in his own skin."

And, most importantly.

"Forgive yourself. Do not beat yourself up too much when you make the wrong choices."

Kat said...

That is a lovely list. Just wonderful. :) And Happy Anniversary!!!

Angela R. Beattie said...

I love this list. Your posts always make my day!

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Love these. And love all four of you!

Rebecca Ramsey said...
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Ronnie said...

Don't worry so much.
Be patient.
It will all become clearer with age.

Loved this post, Becky!

Ronnie said...

Have fun celebrating. You two look adorable.

Unknown said...

Becky, I always love your blog posts. Love the lessons I learn from you. My advice to my younger self would be to do what you love to do-write if you want to write and do not worry about what others will think. Be kind, but go ahead and write.

Creations by Marie Antoinette and Edie Marie said...

I believe Dear,
That yoy hit all the heads of the nails for me.I'm sitting here skaking my head at each one of your remarks to ones self.
My fav to myself is...
Get up and do something even if its wrong.Laying around all day is not righ.
Blessings Hon,God loves us,
XXOO Marie Antionette

Adrienne said...

You've got some some great lessons there for all ages - in fact I really need to do number 7!

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Unknown said...

But the mistakes you made when you were younger are what make you wiser when you are older =)..I stumbled across your blog and really enjoyed reading your posts!

Kelly H-Y said...

Loved your list!!! Especially how your worded #8 ... perfection! I start getting so worked up by people proclaiming to be Christian who then turn around and judge others based on something said in the Bible. Context, people ... historical timing, author, intended recipients ... all need to be considered! I love the way you worded that one! Jesus' message was to love one another, not judge one another.

Unknown said...

You two look good :)

Spiderman Games

Sumner said...

These tips are pretty great. I like the perspective.

A Day to Remember

Avatar Games said...

Forever lasting love how cute just reminds of of the games at Girl Games

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